Thursday, December 31, 2009

The Breakfast

We spent a fantastic time in East London, with our family over the Christmas period, and in order to thank them for their hospitality i arranged to take them to the Fish River Sun for breakfast, my brother in law is always saying how great it is, and how much he enjoys going. I assumed that it was expensive so with that in mind we made the arrangements to go on Sunday the day before we left.
My brother in law sent us all off to bed early because we had to get up early, so we could leave early, we had an hours drive and he wanted to get there , before all the food ran out............. He was like a child before Christmas, he kept on giving us timing countdowns............ 30 minutes to go ............ 20 minutes to go ................ 10 minutes to go ......
He even asked us earlier if we had been to the "Chinbutzi" to off load to make space for the breakfast, by this time i was getting really worried as to how much this was going to cost me, luckily i had my credit card, so was ready for anything, and no matter the cost i would have still done it to say thank you ............
We arrived at exactly 8.30 and the breakfast began ............................. we were now eating all out to get our monies worth........................ I started with, grapefuit juice and Meusli with Bulgarian Yoghurt and fresh fruit mmmmmmmmmmmmm, I then , had champagne and orange juices and bacon, sausage, (the best pork sausage i have ever tasted), tomato mmmmmmmmmmmmmm, no bread allowed because that fills you, and you can't then get your monies worth ................. I then had a second breakfast of guava juice sausage, bacon and an omelete with cheese mushrooms mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm by now i am feeling a little full, but in line with "getting my monies worth" i went back a mango juice and a bowl of fruit, melons, strawberries, guava's oranges grapefruit mmmmmmmmmmm by now i was ready to open the button of my trousers and begining to feel somewhat full, did i stop no way, i was going to make quite sure that i was going to eat what i paid for so ..................... i had an orange juice and a waffle with syrup and ice cream, covered in flake and jelly tots mmmmmmmmmmmmm
By now i was not only feeling full, but also slightly sick ............................................. but did i let that stop me NO WAY....
I then ordered tea, when the waitress was pouring the tea, it looked like water so i stopped her pouring and showed her to put the pot down so that i could stir it to make it stronger, she misunderstood me somewhat and started to pour the tea into the plate next to me ........... well that was certainly the end of a quiet breakfast, we laughed so much the entire restaurant was looking at us, i can imagine what the tourists were saying about the noisy South Africans ................... well i got my cup of tea in the cup ................ and had it was a Danish pastry mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm by now i was sure i had got my money's worth so went to pay the bill ............................... it worked out to R 75.00 per peson .......................... i had eaten enough to feed a small army ................................. boy did i feel guilty ........................ especially since my brother in law left the restaurant with pockets full of pesassio nuts, he kind of kept missing his mouth and they would land in the pocket of his shirt ....................... accidently of course .......................

New Year

I cannot believe that another year has gone...................365 days........................52 weeks and the momentus occassion of my 50th birthday......................... gone forever, they say time waits for no man ............. when i look back i see the wasted time , the things i should have done and didn't, the people i should have phoned and didn't, the apologies i should have made and didn't................ I look back on this the last day of 2009 and there is a lot of regret............ a lot of things that i would have done differently if i had the chance to do it over, a lot of different decisions, a lot of different choices ......... but there is also a lot of joy, for the things i know that i did do right.
I would like to think that i did give something back for all the blessings that i know i have received, as i think of my surprise 50th birthday party, there were so many people there for me, for Karen Whittal i was so humbled by their presence, if think of the retreat, for me the highlight of my year, to be so surrounded by the presence of God is something which i will never forget, it is one of those experiences that you know no matter how hard your try cannot be repeated, cannot be duplicated, i pray that i have influenced someone, somewhere by my sermons .......... i pray that i have given just a fleeting moment of joy to someone, somewhere.................
As i go into 2010 i know that this is REALLY my year of change, but i know that i am ready, i know that i can achieve whatever i want to because God is my strength............. i can feel that he is in control, i can feel that is showing me the way, i prayed so hard for the change of heart of my husband, but each time the door was closed, and although i known that God is capable of all things, i also know that it is in his time, and that i need to bring the joy back into my life, i need to live and not to exist from day to day, i need to now consider me, my needs, my wants and my desires..................... i for the first time in my life am going to be selfish, and only do what i want to do, when i want to do it,
I know that my world will be turned upside down, i know there will be tears, I know there will be consequences.......... but i also know i am surrounded by friends who will be there for me, who will help me to to through this dark tunnel and out to the light which i know is at the end ............................
I know that when i get back into the light i will be the person i was born to be, and the person i have become over the years, in order to protect myself from the hurt, to protect myself from the insults, to protect myself from feeling will be gone forever.......................

Saturday, December 26, 2009

Christmas

Yesterday was the perfect Christmas day for me, it was overcast and raining, and there was no presents to open....................nothing not one ................ no pretending that you like something, no disappointment when you did not get what you wanted, no sulking because someone got more than you, no broken anything, no gadgets that needed batteries which were not included .................................... for as long as i can remember i have not liked Christmas...........................
As a child i remember cold Christmas's we would venture out no matter what the weather, we would go and have Christmas lunch with one of the Grans and then later on go and visit the other Gran for dessert............... we would go and see all our cousins and i remember it being fun.
When we came to South Africa i have never got used to the hot Christmas's it just does not feel like Christmas, my sisters would wake up early we would open all our presents and then they would all go back to sleep, something that i have never been able to do and would leave me awake all alone, by the time they eventually woke up i had already read most of the annuals which was always the rage when i was small............... younger ............ i don't think that they even print those annuals anymore................ i wonder why ..........
In South Africa we have always had Christmas dinner on Christmas Eve because it was just to hot too have it on Christmas day, so Christmas day was always left overs ........... leftover brussel sprouts still does not work for me .......................... we always had to have 4 brussel sprouts with our Christmas dinner, we all hated them and would disguise them with tomato sauce................ or when we were younger with my Grans rubber gravy, when you were given gravy you should also have been given a fishing rod, because after your food was drowned in it, it was always difficult to find you food with out messing it all over the table, yourself, your sister , the floor ...........................
This year with the wind blowing and the rain and the cold , it really felt like Christmas................... the time when Jesus was born to change the relationship of the human race with his father................ so i supposed that it makes sense that this Christmas for me is one of change ...... my life will never be the same again .................... but i will still make my children eat their brussel sprouts.............. so that sonething of my parents will always be present as Christmas..............................

Laughter

They say there is no tonic like laughter and they are so right, we really have done nothing but laugh for days, in fact i think that is all we have done................
Everything is a joke, and my sides are constantly sore from laughing but, some of the highlight laughers are ..............................
On our first night we were playing 30 seconds, a game where y0u get the answer and you have to get other people to guess the answer i love playing games but seldom get people at home who will play with me, My brother in law was asking my sister in law the question as they were on the same team, and he said the answer is what he is and does everyday, the answers we got were "farmer", "shopkeeper", and an "arsehole" was slipped in there and when he had to give us the answer it was "The Good Samaritan"......................... well we just rolled on the floor, we could not believe it............
Then when we went to the braai, we were invited to the braai, when we got there they were all fixing the TV, nothing had been done, we started the fire ourselves, my brother in law as ususal had an enornmous fire, to braai a few pieces of meat, when we were leaving i saw a pile of wood with a grid on, and thought that the braai had melted, everyone laughed at me............................
My sister in law was telling us of the time she was coming back from Gauteng, and there was storm clouds billowing over the mountains, and she wanted to take some photos because it looked so beautiful, well when she got home and looked at the photos she had been holding the camera the wrong way, and had taken pictures, of her had, half her head and the stearing wheel........................
Then my daughter was telling me how when my sister in law had bent over to pick something up and she had "squeaked" ....................... i wondered what they were laughing at.............
Right now they are all playing hangman, and it is just laughter, have you ever heard of a "bongo muffin" .................................
It will be really difficult when we have to leave and go back to the real world................. but we still have some time left.............. to laugh ........................

Friday, December 25, 2009

Christmas Eve

What a lovely Christmas Eve we had full of laughter just the tonic that the doctor ordered, I had not realised just how uptight and stressed i was, i looked into the mirror yesterday and saw that i no longer had the black bags under my eyes, i am sleeping through and feel really good, and i realised even though it was hard to leave my eldest daughter behind at this, her favourite time of year, i don't think i could have faced Christmas at home, it is really painful to know that your whole life is going to change, and you are going to be the cause of it, but for once in my life i am going to do what every one else does and just worry about me.....................

We were up early in the morning and had breakfast in Port Alfred at a strange little Tea garden, which is really small and nothing to look at but the atmosphere is amazing, in line with our holiday policy i threw caution to the wind and had a scone with cream, jam and cheese for breakfast, i must admit that i felt guilty but i enjoyed it never the less, we then did our first Christmas shopping................................ i had said that i wanted nothing to do with Christmas this year...................... but i eventually gave in and although i had promised myself that i would not buy any gifts until after Christmas i just could not do it................ so admitted defeat and bought just a few presents,which i hope will be liked by their thoughtfulness and not their price, although i must say i did manage to keep the presents within the limit i had given myself.

We then spent the rest of the morning in Bathurst which is really such a friendly town, so many gift shops and craft shops that you are really spoiled for choice................ we had lunch at the hotel, and since we were here last year the place has really gone down, the service was worse than bad .................. it was disgusting ................. we waited so long that eventually i just paid for what we had, had and left.................. i hope that someone does something it cannot take 45 minutes to pour two cold drinks no matter how busy you are.................. we bought some beautiful and i hope unusual gifts.

We then went to the lighthouse the view is amazing i think that this is one of the most beautiful views in the whole of the Eastern Cape, where else can you have a 280 degree view of the sea.

I had hoped to go up the light house this time, but again time became a problem and the tour was already full, we needed to be back by 2pm because my daughter had promised to help hand out sweet parcels to the local children. The last two nights have been a party at the shop the people loved the music and flocked to join in the party, which was really good for business ......... but for me if i heard " If i marry me will you marry me" once more there could have been severe consequences for someone...................

We spent the evening with Matthew and Genine, and we really had a good laugh, we tried out their new dining room i would never have thought that red was a good colour for a room, but it looks absolutely stunning, so warm and rich.............. it was quite funny we were invited for the braai, but they were busy putting in a new TV, definately a blood relative cannot wait for "the right moment" has do do it right now, so we ended up starting the fire and braaiing the meat .................... but it was worth it we had such fun, and laughed almost as much as when we played 30 seconds the other evening.

What a great way to spend the evening ........................ Christmas tomorrow ............... the worst day of the year, i just don't like Christmas i am not sure whether it has to do with the weather, or whether it is because you go to so much time and trouble and it is over so quickly ....................................

Thursday, December 24, 2009

Circus

I just love the circus there is something, so exciting about going to the circus, it seems like a life full of adventure, of travel of meeting new people everyday, i am sure however that if you ask the people in the circus they would have a completely different story to tell.

My daughter had seen the circus and she asked if we could go, to make sure that we got a good place i phoned to book a "good seat" we had to pick up the tickets 1 hour before the show started.......... which was really silly, because the place was only half full.

We were shown to our seats, i did not realise that i had booked the VIP seats, and they were in the front row, right opposite the curtain the best seats in the house or so we thought.............

The people next to us were really strange the lady had on a tiny and i mean tiny black sequined dress so short that if she coughed you would see what she had for breakfast............. with high heeled shoes she wobbled herself to her seat......... the best is yet to come ...............

We were about two seconds into the show when the heavens opened, i don't mean just rain i mean sheets of water and i of course would be sitting under the only hole in the entire tent, you will be amazed at how wet one tiny drop of water can make you, i had to move up and up and up...................

I had gone to work in the morning in a skirt and high heeled shoes, but had felt uncomfortable about going to the circus in a skirt, and thank goodness i could have looked the lady in the black sequinned dress, so my daughter and i went to the local store and bought a cheap pair of plastic shoes the only pair in a size 7, and a cheap pair of black 3/4 pants................. which i went into the docters car park and quickly changed before we went to the circus........ i am so glad, because 15 minutes into the rain storm a river started flowing from the back of the tent, under our chair and into the arena................. one minute my feet were dry the next minute we were wet up to our ankles............. obviously we had to move as they began digging up the front to divert the water away from the arena................ where the "artists" were having somewhat of a hard time.................. not to mention the lady in the sequinned dress as as she stood up, her dressed had creeped up and was wedged between the cheeks of her but............................. we really tried so hard not to laugh.....................................

The trapeeze artists were coming into the arena with their skin tight leotards on and wellington boots.............. although i must admit they were brightly coloured and looked quite cute, they were definitely not too impressed by the fact that when they got to the top of the tent, they were literally getting showered with the water that was coming in through the holes around the poles that kept the tent up................

The guys who were spinning the plates had the worst deal, the plates would just not spin when they got wet and kept falling off all over the place ........................

Even with the rain, we had a really good time and laughed a lot ............................ i really like the circus................... full of adventure and fun .......................

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Changes

When i started to blog i wanted to make some changes in my life but for a million and one reasons including my daughters wedding i found myself in a situation where i needed to leave things as they were. But the Monday after the wedding i went and started putting things in place to eventually start the changes i had promised myself at the beginning of last year i went, to a lawyer and filed for a divorce. And although my husband will always be my first love, the father to my children, and i will deep down always love him, i am no longer prepared to except the disappearing acts, the unwillingness to pay his share, and the total lack of affection for anyone but himself, and the stories he makes up either because he believes they are real, or to cover up what he is doing in his own life.

To get away from the stress and the mudane, my youngest daughter and i decided to go on a "road trip" after her Dad had informed her he would see her after Christmas,no Christmas present no pocket money, nothing and what fun we have had so far we decided to do everything different than we usually do it, we could not chose the food we normally ate, we could not eat at the places we would normally eat ,we are not allowed to drink what we would normally drink.
We sang all the way in the car with no one telling us to be quiet, we refused to eat at Wimpy's and instead had amazing meals at incredible restaurants, when we arrived at our over night stop, we changed and spent hours in the pool cooling off............... what a relaxing end to a long drive.
Supper was different very nice and very different, a tiny little restaurant, the service was amazing the food was good, and i finished with a Vanilla Coffee.......................jummy................... will definately have one of those again.............
The next morning, we had a leasurely breakfast, and we were back on the road, spend an hour shopping in Queenstown, which has the best Mr Price in South Africa, i have never in my life stood in such a long queue, the queue was down from the till and down the entire lenght of the shop, there must hae been about 60 people in front of us, but my daughter had found the "perfect" outfit so in the queue we stood and stood and stood..............................
When we arrived in East London we went to a place on the beach and had a milkshake, we had a Blue Dolphin Shake, which you would think would be blue, we still do not know what it was, it was brown??? My daughter is going withj Horlicks, and i am going with "just awful" and we
just watched the sea, the entire trip was amazing we had constant phone calls from people making sure that we were safe, and that we were all on time, our phones never stopped ringing, how blessed we are to be surrounded by such amazing people.
In the evening we played a game "30 seconds" we have never laughed so much, we were 3 teams and my daughter and i won the first round .................
This morning we were up early and spent the morning chilling out on the beach, we got a little sunburnt, but where else can you share a beach with only 30o other people at the height of the holdiday season...................
Tomorrow we are off to Port Alfred for the day, we are meeting some friends there for lunch................... this is the most relaxing holiday i have had in a long time i wonder why...........................................

,

Monday, December 14, 2009

The Wedding

The wedding is over, and it was all we could have wished for, the day dawned bright and sunny, i dropped by youngest daughter at the hairdresser, at the crack of dawn, because it was a long and busy day ahead, i then rushed over to the florist, before she dropped the bridal bouquets at the venue, instead of keeping it at the shop for the bride, we discovered early on that although there work was absolutely stunning, they were none of them the brightest crayon in the box............ the sharpest tool in the shed ................ and they were stunning, when my daughter gets an idea, she know exactly what she wants and how to make it a reality, the bridesmaid flowers were in silver tin handbags, with white roses peeping out of the top, and the brides bouquet, was stunning, with its green and white flowers.
As i rushed the bridesmaids all four of them between hair and makeup, the only benefit being that i could stay in the car which had the airconditioner on full blast to keep me cool, in more ways than one, the bride was being pampered to a breakfast and a very relaxing morning, by a good friend of mine, she wandered into the hairdresser at about 12 as calm as a cucumber, while we were stressing somewhat, one of the flower girls was caught in traffic so was running late for her hair appointment, the other bridesmaid was still at the "bush " stage and her hair still had to be curled.
The bride was deposited at a friends house, to change and for the first photo's one of over 500 that were taken that day.
When i saw my daughter in her full dress and veil the day before, i began to cry, the wedding was truly a reality, with her hair and makeup on she looked stunning, and as the groom said later in the evening, "She really does clean up well."
My daughter always wanted to drive to her wedding in old cars, and is that is my husbands hobby, she was taken to the wedding venue in two old beige Rovers, which looked stunning with their black and green ribbons, the only downfall too old cars is no air conditioners, luckily the day was not melting hot, just uncomfortable hot........... the trip also took twice as long in the old cars, than we had allowed for, at one point during the trip i think the whole of Heidelberg, was stuck in the traffic jam behind us........
The chapel was tiny and very hot, certainly not built or designed to seat 150 people, our small wedding ended up with 150 people............... at one point i thought i would melt completely and only pools of fat would remain to show i had been there, luckily the weather turned and a breeze came up to cool the chapel down, although the service was in Afrikaans, it was very thought provoking, and very light hearted....... with the minister laughing and joking with the bride and groom.
Then the storm came up, a true Highveld storm, lots of thunder and lightning and a pitch black sky, so the photo phase of the wedding was cut short as people rushed to get inside before the heavens opened, and open they did, at one time you could not hear yourself think above the noise of the rain on the tin roof.
The place looked stunning, in fact the venue owner told me that this was the smartest table wedding she had ever seen, the slide show was fun...... full of old photos of the parents weddings, and the pair as they were growing up, something different............... and then the rain stopped and my daughter go her wish, that all her photos could be taken with the sunset as a back drop and what a sunset it was ....................................
Food was great, the music was great, the people were great, the 150 cup cakes that made up the wedding cake were absolutely stunning, and an amazing time was had by all, at 00.00 i asked that everyone be thrown out as i was not paying extra for the extra time............and as someone said the invitation said "Smart, Casual" and that is exactly what the day was Smart .............. Casual ................

I AM WHO I AM

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