Today was one of those days which just started off right, I spent some quality time with my Lord this morning and just know that i really connected, i had a peaceful quiet journey into work, just praising the Lord for his amazing creation, and the beauty of the season, the weather was cold the wind was blowing, the sky was grey, really unusual for a South African winter, as are skies are normally always bright blue even when it is cold. But in someway is was just comforting, the stillness and darkness of the morning.
It made me want to sit by a roaring fire, with a glass of wine and with someone who i could feel free to share my deepest secrets with, that "someone" is not in my life right now, but i know that he will be, that it is my right to have someone who will always just be there for me.
I realised that my joy depends on me, and i cannot hold anyone else accountable for how i feel. If i allow someone to bring me down, then i have given then power over me, and then that gives them the ability to hurt me.
I am so fortunate, no i am so blessed to have so many really good friends, who i know will always be there for me, should i ever need a shoulder to cry on, someone to share coffee with as i plot someones demise, someone to laugh at "wind" jokes with, someone to share a meal with, i know that i could never be lonely, because i have all these people who i care about and who care about me.
Then i realised that is really what life is all about it is not about the car you drive, the house you live in the amount of money you have in your bank account, it is about how many people in your contacts on your cell phone that you can really call friend.
As a child i was tall, skinny and very shy, i was very "nerdy" i was a prefect, a junior town councillor, but never one of the in crowd, never one of those that people missed if you were not there, never visible, if i look at my own daughters they are just so confident, and are able to talk to anyone, of any age or any race or any culture, i am not sure at what point in time, i began to change, at what point i began to like who i was, began to hold my head up high and be noticed, who would have thought just a few years ago that i would be standing up in front of 40 to 60 people and giving motivational messages, and i know that this is because my friends saw in me, something that i could not see, in fact something that i still cannot see, they encouraged me when i doubted myself.
To those people i call friends thank you for being in my life, thank you for listening, thank you for being someone i can call friend........................